Will you dislike me because we’re not practicing CDD anymore?

My husband and I decided to stop practicing CDD and any form of punishment on me last month.

Since then I had procrastinated a few times and didn’t work on the tasks until the last minute, but I still managed to make the deadline. So far our spanking-free life has been good.

After all we are making this change for our kids in the future. We want to get into the mindset that it’s okay for our children to make mistakes and learn from the mistakes without the threat of physical punishment. And my role as a mom is a role of a mature adult so I can’t be a little girl that’s “parented” and regularly disciplined by my husband. The role of my husband, on the other hand, supports the family with me. He’s not a disciplinarian but a decisive, loving parent. This is our vision of a family.

Initially when I started this blog I wrote about the punishment I got from my husband. I think it’s okay for a couple. But when we started thinking about having kids, we thought twice and had lots of discussions and decided that we want a loving, supportive home without spanking for our future kids.

I hope you won’t dislike me because of this change of roles.

When my husband and I first got married, I was very young. We followed what his church suggested about CDD and started to be disciplined. I got spanked a lot on my bare bottom by his hand and over my pants with a ruler in our first year of marriage. As years went by, it became about once a month or a few times a year. Then last year I was spanked a lot and even caned with  a nursery cane many times because of my bad behaviour caused by my graduate school studies, a very busy job, a lack of time for leisure  and so on. At one point even my husband thought we should think again about how to make a loving couple.

In the end we wanted to see if we can still live our life normally without any form of punishment. We wanted to learn how to love each other without any condition and respect each other as an adult.

We have to change our beliefs for our kids in the future, and it takes time for us to learn, adapt and change.

Please wish me luck.